Clown School part 1

 

It’s been just over a week since I got back from France and my time at Ecole Philippe Gualier. It’s hard to know where to start really. I honestly have had two of the best weeks of my life and am feeling inspired and motivated. Although it was never intended on being therapeutic, 2 weeks of prancing around, eating delicious food, being silly and focusing on my craft has been far more ‘healing’ than any of my recent travel experiences. Yikes. I’m such a hippy. But good to know where I can go if I need a break from ordinary life, as apparently, it’s not the beach.

Getting there was an absolute breeze, GOD BLESS THE EUROSTAR. Honestly, I wax lyrical about it every time I take it and vow to only use it when travelling round Europe, before promptly forgetting. Well, it’s written down now. In a weird coincidence, I was sat across from one of my soon-to-be classmates. Nell did look quite arty and was writing with an actual pen and notebook, so I wondered if she was headed to the same place as me. I wasn’t quite brave enough to ask a stranger on a train if they were going to clown school.

Anyway, easy breezy and I hop off the train at Guard Du Nord. After a long queue for tickets (I’ve since learnt you can get an app, will do so next time), I get a bargain ticket for 5euro all the way to Etampes, a town south west of Paris. My cousin Jo lives in Paris, so we discussed the possibility of me staying and commuting, but everyone’s advice was to stay in the town, and I’m glad I did.

It was absolutely freezing. This was my first experience of subzero temperatures since circa Feb 2022, and it was harsh. Luckily, I had doubly checked with my booking.com hosts that the studio flat I had booked had functioning heating. Too much time in old Italian houses had taught me many lessons. Thought perhaps it’s not fair to tar the entirety of continental Europe with the same brush. I couldn’t find a taxi from the station, and the thought of walking 20mins with my suitcase made my fragile post-Aussie body sad, so luckily the hosts came and picked me up. I also arrived to discover that there was no wifi in the flat. Gasp. That’s ok, I assured them. I had a little bit of data left, and if I’m desperate, I can go to McDonalds. Of which I did instantly. When in Rome. I accidently over ordered a meal that came with ‘free’ chicken nuggets, but was pleasantly surprised to find all of the packaging plastic and reusable, you just return it to the counter. Wild.

That night, I promised myself that I wouldn’t use my precious remaining data on mindlessly scrolling social media. Whoops.

The following morning, I woke with the excitement you get on the first day of a new school/University/job. It’s the best isn’t it? I might just do this every January. Start something big and new, just to have that feeling.

I’d been sent a slightly terrifying email saying that although class started at 10:30, doors would only be open between 09:30-10:15 to enter. After which point, they’d be locked and you were not to bang on the door, ring the bell or text them as it will not open until the next break. Harsh. I do have a persistent issue with cutting things fine for this type of thing, so determined to be a new woman, I vowed to leave the house extra early every day (which I actually maintained!). Once they unlocked the doors, you had to go in, disinfect your shoes, take them off, and put on your clean indoor shoes. We also had to take a covid test. Which I passed, despite feeling like I was on the cusp of starting a cold (spoilers, I was right). We were also told not to wear any outside clothes in the studios, so I obediently changed. I didn’t really mind all the rules so much. I’m guessing they were there to keep Gaulier (now in his 80s) safe.

First up, we had movement for two hours. This is a bit like what I had done at Uni. So a mixture of playing games, prancing around and using our bodies in different ways.  The surprising addition to this was acrobatics. It was all about impulse and moving forward, you can’t chicken out of a cartwheel halfway through. Some say that the physical act of tumbling and being upside down also does something to your perspective. Ben, our teacher, said that by the end of the two weeks, many of us will be doing cartwheel round offs into supported backflips. He’d obviously not met me yet. I was very excited at this prospect as I have about as much gymnastic ability as a goldfish. First of all, we practised handstands in pairs. This was my first hurdle. I’d never really done one in my life, and never managed it at uni either. But somehow (probably with a lot of support) I found myself shrieking because I was upside down for the first time ever. We also had to practise roly-polys on mats, I wasn’t very good at this.

We also did some CRAZY trust exercises, which included people jumping off ladders backwards into our arms (I made sure I was well away from the middle with my shrew like arms) or running and leaping onto everyone’s arms.

I came out of the class absolutely buzzing. It was just like being back at uni, and I felt this side of me suddenly awake again. Oh, to be starting my day off with a game of dodgeball and thinking intently about how I should be landing a handstand. All of these things are genuinely useful for clowning and carefully curated.

The average age in my class was probably about 27 and was mainly people in their 20s and 30s. Roughly a third were British and the rest were a mix of American, South American, Aussie and European. A few actors, a few improv people like me, a couple of professional circus clowns, writers, stand ups. Everyone was so interesting. The other group was slightly more of a mix of ages I think.

In the afternoon, it was time for Improvisation aka clowning. We had to do different games and exercises, often wearing different noses/masks or wearing our red noses. A lot of the exercises involved you coming out onto stage and trying to make everyone laugh. If your funny idea didn’t work and you failed (also known as a flop), then the teacher (usually a guy called Carlos, but sometimes Philippe Gaulier himself) would bang a drum and shout ‘flop’.  At which point, you needed to redeem yourself, sharpish. This would normally lead to another flop and your final chance. If you flopped again, then either you’d be told to go and sit down, or the teacher would make some suggestions or things to try. They always did this in a playful way ‘Vicky, can you be less boring please? Who hear thinks she is boring? Put your hand up. Could you try talking in a less boring voice?’ etc etc. Most people on the course took it pretty well. I quite enjoyed it. It was truthful, no tip toeing around someone’s feelings.

As a performer, you had to be quick. Really quick. In improv, I can talk my way out of most ‘flops’ or at least have 30 seconds to save the show. Here you have less than 10 seconds and an increasingly unforgiving audience. We also did lots of exercises to practice being in a playful, almost childlike state.  The main thing of many difficult things about clowning is that you need to stop and check in with the audience all the time. A bit like when you are playing Grandma’s footsteps and you have to freeze mid game (we did play a lot of this too). This was hard, I rarely break the fourth wall in improv and stopping for a second when you’re in the zone is difficult, especially when you are trying to be as ridiculous as possible. Takes a lot of practice I suppose.

After class, we’d often head to the nearby bar/café for a hot chocolate in debrief. We’d finish at 3pm, so time for that, and to do a bit of job hunting too. I managed to not miss any job ads/applications while I was away, which I was pretty proud of. And cements my instinct that this was a good idea while I waited for employment to come along. A few of my classmates fitted in work around the course too, something I hope to do in the future perhaps.

That first evening, I ran out of data and with no way to top up, and my tablet not working, I was faced with an evening with no internet or TV for the first time in about 10 years. Gasp. The horror. I ended up writing extensive course notes and reading lots. But stopped short of getting out a loom or playing with an egg cup and ball. That night I had the best night’s sleep ever.

The next morning, there was snow on the ground and the town was looking even more twee. I don’t really like snow, because other than it’s atheistic and the fun of a snowball fight, it makes walking anywhere difficult.  And besides, I had to avoid breaking any bones, so I could go to my acrobatics class and try to do the same.

The week went by mercifully slowly (often the way with new things!), and I had lots of fun. My handstands improved and I stopped shrieking when upside down. We did this mad trust exercise where you had to run with your eyes shut and not slow down and your classmates had to catch you. We practised giving to everything to the audience and being ‘proud’. We also started to do clown exercises in pairs, practising who is in major (aka the focus) and minor. Myself and my friend Syd (who is also an improviser from LA, ooo) even managed to save ourselves from our third flop one afternoon by having a cry off and getting into a very silly fight. On stage of course.

The evenings were spent hanging out with my new found friends or living my best Edwardian life in my internet free apartment. Oh, and trying to resist the urge of buying everything from the nearby boulangerie and only eating baguettes, cheese and croissants.  It reminded me so much of when I worked for ACLE in Italy in 2015. A January spent in a random European town doing lots of comedy, playing lots of games, getting to know some interesting people from all over and not a care in the world.

We also received our costume choices from Philppe on Thursday afternoon. One by one, we’d have to turn round, try to make the audience jump by shouting boo, and then look proud. He’d then stare at us for a bit, ask some questions, then tell us our costume. Weirdest personality test ever. Luckily for me, he said I was ‘very charming’ (haha, perhaps I’ll put that on my CV), before promptly deciding I was a Viking. Probably the messy blondish hair and the fact my name began with a V. People got a range of, at times, slightly insulting costumes; an alter boy, snow white, a truck driver. But the idea was that it was just something to make you look even more ridiculous and to not let it become too much of a character. They had bits of costumes already, but encouraged you to make your own over the weekend.

And with that, I hopped, skipped and jumped my way to Jo’s in Paris for the weekend. 

Clown School- What is it and why am I going?

 

Hello! So this is a wee bonus post or two about what I am up to. And that is sat on a Eurostar on my way to Entampes, near Paris, to go to clown school.

First off, a bit about it all. So the place I am studying is called Ecole Philippe Gualier. Which roughly translates as Phil’s school. Gualier is what’s known as a ‘master clown’ and trained under Jacques Le  Coq, who also has his own school going in France. Clowning is a serious business. I’m not even joking. Think of it more like ballet or a music conservatory. Some very serious people have taken the time, over hundreds of years, to work on the ancient art of prancing around and being funny.  Much like actors spend time at drama school learning how to master controlling their bodies, voices and minds, so must a clown.

So yes, as wankey and pretentious as you can get!

Now I know what you’re thinking. Big tent, juggling balls, and a unicycle. The word clown makes most of us think of the circus, as that’s the only place we’ve heard that word associated. And while that’s not entirely wrong, as often clown acts are found there, clowning in general is so much broader. Think Mr Bean, think Sasha Baron Cohen (e.g. Ali G, Borat), think Stav Lets Flats, think of those funny videos on tiktok with people falling over. Then also think smaller, subtler, Ted Lasso or the characters in The Office.

I might be completely wrong, but my understanding of clowning is the ability of being able to react truthfully and show that to the person watching. And to find the funny.

The one stereotypical thing we probably will do, is have a red nose. The red nose is considered to be the worlds smallest mask, and for some tried and tested reason, works in most cases.

Our classes are divided into Movement and Improvisation. Movement, I expect to be very similar to what I had near daily on my undergrad degree- lots of prancing around and generally learning how to move and control our bodies, which are our main instrument in clowning. Improvisation I imagine is going to be us standing on stage with nothing around us and working out a way to keep the attention of and amuse our classmates and to ‘find the game, play the game, and recognise when the game is over’. Which ties in scrumptiously with all of my sketch and improv antics.

And to find out our ‘type of clown’. A bit like Myers-Briggs personality test or a horoscope, we can all be divided into a type. And we all have a type of inner clown. Something that makes us interesting to be watched, silly and our gut instincts. My understanding is that if we can remove our ego, then we can find this. There are a few different types; Boss Clown, Naughty Clown, Sad Clown, Bashful Clown, Angry Clown. This is all from memory from Uni and hearsay, so I'll let you know if I'm wrong.

I’ve heard all sorts of things about Gualiers teaching methods. That he really takes on the boss clown role and tells it to you bluntly- ‘you’re not funny’, ‘you’re not interesting’, ‘make me interested’. So I’m largely expecting to have two weeks of being insulted by an old man. Very French.

Now on to the why I am I doing this. It’s always been something that has seemed vaguely interesting. A few of my close friends have been to various iterations of clown schools around the world over the years. But it wasn’t until a few of my improv friends in Melbourne flew all the way to Paris to do it was my interest piqued. It makes sense to me to go right to the source, rather than having second hand information taught to me (not that I’m slagging off any other clown schools/teachers). There are two in France that are considered some of the best in Europe (if not the world)- Gualier or Le Coq. The latter requires a year or two’s commitment, where as the former does offer short courses, making it much easier to fit it around working and life in general. I was vaguely looking into doing it this summer, knowing that it would be tricky to get the time off work, when I saw this January edition of the course. I also knew that it was unlikely that I would have a job by now, of which I was correct. And it would be difficult to justify it once I'm back being a proper grown up after travelling. I'd have to chose between clown school and things like car insurance, and the former would never win. So why not self-improve whilst I was waiting.

I have no real ulterior motive here other than to get better at something that I like doing. It’s nice making people laugh, so why not try to improve. I’d be keen to go to Chicago at some point to do an improv course at the birthplace of improv too, but one step at a time.

We did do a module or two in Clowning at uni. I didn’t really enjoy it at the time, and wasn’t very good at it.

So we’ll find out if that’s changed in a couple of week’s time.

Here is a couple of links for further reading if you are interested:
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Philippe_Gaulier

https://www.theguardian.com/stage/2016/aug/02/philippe-gaulier-clown-school-emma-thompson-sacha-baron-cohen-edinburgh-festival-interview

https://www.nytimes.com/2022/01/18/arts/television/philippe-gaulier-clowns.html

Thailand part 3- The final chapter, Bangkok

I had big plans for Bangkok- myself, Sam and Jo were going to go on a night out on Ko Sang Road, a street notorious for its bars and clubs. But again, I wasn’t feeling so great. By this one, I’d figured out that it was just exhaustion of running around for months on end, plus perhaps not getting on so well with Asian diary products.  So instead, I went to bed really early. 

I had definitely chosen a good hostel in Bangkok. Again, it was much more like a hotel (infact, it had a hotel section), and the beds were comfy, high end and private. It was walking distance from lots of sights, but annoyingly, not that close to a sky train or metro station, which is where I seemed to be needing to get to throughout my time in Bangkok. Although this did give me a fortune of meeting Kamul the grab driver on my way to brunch with Sam and Jo the next day. Kamul was the nicest driver ever and we had a great chat. He had lots of recommendations too and proved to be really helpful over the next few days. Brunch was great, I ate prorridge for the first time in weeks and was soo happy. We were in an area called Sukhumvit, which was busy, with lots of high end hotels and shopping centres around, as well as the skytrain and metro, and I was really pleased to be in a more western setting for the first time in weeks. I also managed to squeeze in a quick video call with mum opening her birthday presents in the in UK too, the wonders of technology! 

Upon Jo’s recommendation, I visited a shopping centre called “Terminal 21” and was not disappointing. Each floor was themed to a geographical area or city, including elaborate toilets. The basement was Caribbean, then there was Rome, Paris, Tokyo, London, Istanbul, San Fransico City, San Fransico Bay, Hollywood. Bathroom highlights for me included a full sized replica ‘Bocca Della Verita’ and fountain taps on the Rome levels, a full sized replica side of a tube in London and huge elaborate Turkish lamps in, yup you’ve guessed it, Istanbul (which I think wins in terms of nicest bathroom). The other great thing about the shopping centres is that you could get street-ish food that would be less ‘risky’. But craving the beige, I went for a subway. 

That evening, I had planned to go for a walk to check out Ko Sang Road, but instead got chatting to some Germans in my dorm room- Philip, Leonie and Lucas. They were vloggers, and were spending their evening editing their footage and playing games and definitely on the same vibe as me. 

The next morning, we all ate breakfast in the café down the road which was lovely. We hatched a plan to go to a weekend market in the north east of the city and Kamul came and picked us up. It was massive and full of the most random things. At one point, we accidently ended up in the pets section, which included hundreds of puppies, kittens and even tiny monkeys. It was quite sad to be honest as a lot of the animals were in small cages and you could see the ones who just hadn’t been sold yet. I wanted to rescue them all! We thought we would only be half an hour or so, but actually spent a good 3 hours there. I ran out of cash pretty quickly, which was probably a good thing, as I wanted to buy everything (it was good value for money). The best thing in there was the leather engraved goods- you could get any name or initials you wanted embossed onto various items for free.  

It was great to be in a group too as it meant we got the bus back to the hostel which was a fun experience. I had avoided buses until now, not because I was worried about personal safety, just because it was confusing and not clear! It was definitely an adventure. 

That evening, we had a dip in the pool and played some games.

The next morning was my ‘chill out day’ to make up for cutting my time in Koh Lanta short. I knew the pool at my hostel didn’t get the sun, so had booked a day pass to a rooftop pool (and gym) at a Hilton in the city. For about £9, I had access to the pool and gym all day and about £4 credit, which was enough to pay for most my lunch. Kamul gave me a lift to the skytrain station (for free!! I tried to give him some cash, but he insisted not to as it was less than 10mins in the car). He also offered to take me to one of the temples near where I was staying at in the evening so that I had at least experienced one in Bangkok. And after going the wrong way twice on the skytrain, I made it to the hotel. It was perfect! Very quiet and I was able to get a bed in the sun no problem. It was my lucky day, a nearby German woman in her 50s got chatting to me and offered me the spare bed in her room that night. I declined as I had plans, but also because it could’ve been the start of a horror film. It’s difficult isn’t it? When to trust people and when not to. I got the sense she was just being generous towards a young (she definitely thought I was about 22) backpacker and perhaps wanted some company. I’d like to think that I’d be like that one day, but probably wouldn’t be inviting them to share a room for fear of how it looked. Anyway, I had a disappointing pool side gluten free pizza, but definitely caught some rays (it was 32c!) before my return to the English winter.

That evening, Kamul took me to a local temple where he prays which was really beautiful by night and not something I would’ve considered. He also picked up some fried bread on the way back which was delicious. On the surface, perhaps the whole thing might’ve seemed suspect, but, like a lot of Thai’s he believes very strongly in Karma, and often takes his customers to places to experience stuff like this. If anyone is heading to Bangkok, let me know and I’ll pass on his details! 

Afterwards, myself and my friends went to Ko San Road. It was slightly over hyped in all of our opinions and probably only enjoyable if you were very drunk. So instead we went back to the hostel and played more games. A perfect final day in Bangkok. Overall, I really liked Bangkok. Lot's of people had slagged it off, but I am definitely going to keep my eyes out for cheap flights there for a week or so.

The next morning, it was off to the airport for my flight home! I did cheekily enquire about an upgrade at the Thai Airways desk (I’m a silver member these days thanks to my return Melbourne- London ticket with them in July), but they quoted me at £900. Seeing as I had only paid about £300 or so for my ticket, I decided against it. Annoyingly, my flight was delayed by three hours, but luckily I had made a friend in the queue. Plus the plane was pretty empty, so I had a whole row to myself which meant I got a good few hours sleep in. 

And with that, my trip was done! I’ll post some more random entries here over the coming weeks that might be interesting e.g. useful things I travel with, things I’ve learnt etc. But if you’ve made it to here, congrats on reaching the end and thanks for reading!

Here is a link to Philip and Leonie's video: Sandy Souls

Please do subscribe. If you put captions on, then you can change the settings to auto translate to English.

Rome themed bathroom

London themed bathroom

Authentic bus experience 

Best decision ever

Temple at night

Monopoly deal!

Home!

Thailand part 2- Phuket, Ko Lanta

I made it through my flight ok and arrived to a sunny and busy Patong beach. This was only really a stopping point on my way to Phuket town the following day. PT doesn’t have a beach, and I was curious to see a mainland beach*. 

Naturally, by the time I’d checked in, got changed, made a packed lunch and headed to the beach, it was suddenly overcast. After setting myself up on the beach, I had literally taken two steps towards the sea before it started chucking it down. Diving into a nearby café (where a hot chocolate cost more than an entire meal in Chiagn Mai), I sat and did a bit of writing waiting the storm to pass. The constant rain was a sign of things to come as an occurring theme for the rest of my time in South Thailand. The rain did slow down, enough for me to dip my feet in the sea (deliciously warm!), and wonder around. Pantong is what I imagine Benidorm to be like. Hundreds of restaurants and bars serving western food and drink, music blaring and people touting for your business. Probably a bit too loud and busy for me, but I hear other parts of Phuket are a bit quieter. Luckily, I was staying in the nicest hostel I stayed in on my trip. It was slightly further away from all of the noise, and was more like a hotel with an ensuite, and the comfiest beds ever. My roommates seemed to be about my age too, which was nice (the average age is usually about 24) and I was almost tempted to change my plans. Instead of going out and taking in Patong’s wild nightlife, I bought some snacks and watched the Netflix documentary about Harry and Meghan. Not very exciting (the documentary).

The next day, I headed to Phuket town to meet up with my friend Sam from work in Melbourne and his partner Jo.  I was super excited to be reunited and to see some familiar faces.  It rained throughout the afternoon, but Phuket Town had a nice market and shops to wonder round. I was staying in what I hoped would be another ‘Posh-tel’ in the town that evening, but it was a bit worn and disappointing. 

The next day, more rain, and time to head to Koh Lanta, an island in between Phuket and Krabi (on the Westcoast). I’d umm’d and ahh’d about where to go in the south of Thailand. My only criteria was somewhere with a nice beach, quietish and easy to get to. A few people had recommended Koh Lanta as ticking those boxes, with the added bonus of being close to lots of other islands for any day trips.  I’d opted for a speed boat (2 hours) rather that a slower, bigger boat (5 hours), but it proved to be an interesting choice on a wavy day. 

My hotel in Koh Lanta was great, run by a lovely woman called Thip who helped me out with booking a snorkling trip, airport transfers etc. The weather still wasn’t great, and thunderstorms were predicted all week, so I had decided to shorten my stay there, despite the great hospitality. Nearby Khong Klong beach was beautiful, with lots of lantern lit restuarants and a few bars. The tide was out quite far, so I had a bit of a walk before I found a bay to swim in, but it was magical. 

The next day, with the weather looking better, I headed out onto a snorkling trip to some nearby islands. The sea was much calmer in the morning and the sun even made an appearance at various intervals. Though not quite as amazing as the great barrier reef, it was still pretty cool and I saw loads of clown fish. Interestingly, when you were swimming under water, you could hear an electricity like sound. After asking the tour guides, apparently this was the sound of the coral, and they often check if they are near alive coral by listening to the water. For lunch we were taken to a beautiful island with white sands and clear turquoise water, before heading to another snorkling spot. On the way back, the sea was choppy again, with everyone getting absolutely soaked. There was a German family on the trip and the Dad was an absolute dobleganger for my Grandpa, so obviously I told him. I hope your cringing in your seats reading that nugget of info. To be fair, he didn’t seem perturbed. 

That evening, Thip organised for me to be picked up and taken to a restaurant on the beach. It was only about a 15minute walk, and did feel fairly safe at night, but definitely preferable to have a lift. After dinner I watched a fire poi show at one of the beach bars and got a lift back to the hotel.

The next day I had no plans but to chill out on Khong Klong beach, but the weather was a bit overcast and promising more rain, so I decided to visit Prae An beach, the more popular one and walk back. It wasn’t much different to where I’d come from and it was impossible to walk back like I planned unless I fancied some coatsteering. Back on an impossibly quiet Khlong Klong, I had lunch then a massage to pass the time (as you do!). The same company offered pedicures, so I opted for that too, which was an absolute distaster, resulting in non drying nail varnish going everywhere when I showered later on and them spending an hour trying to sort it out when I returned later. I didn’t know cowboy pedicurists existed until now. That being said, I wasn’t about to kick up a fuss over a tenna.

The following morning, I was sad to leave a still drizzly Koh Lanta, but glad I wasn’t hanging around for the rubbish weather. After a 2 hour drive (that included a quick car ferry to the mainland), I met a traveller friend Deardrie in Karbi town before my flight. We had lunch and wondered round, the place itself was a bit of a dump, but I hear wonderful things about the nearby beaches. Then it was off to Bangkok!

*I've since discovered that Phuket is an island, whoops!

Reunited with my mate Sam

Khlong Kong beach

Caption competition 

Snorkling views

A moment of sunshine 

look how clear the water is!

View from the balcony

Thailand part 1- Chiang Mai

I was pretty happy to be leaving Vietnam after all my adventures there. Although I only had two weeks in Thailand, I was determined to go to a few different places to get a taste of it and to try my best to chill out before going home.

Chaign Mai was not what I was expecting. Although I knew it was quieter, I was still bracing myself for a South East Asian city- busy, loud and chaotic. It was quite the opposite. Well certainly where I was staying in the old quarter. It was very peaceful. There were pavements too and traffic would stop if you tried to cross. I was staying at a lush hostel called Lullaby, which was spotless, in good condition and covered in fairy lights. It was also pretty easy to make friends- they offered free classes twice a day of Yoga, Muay Thai Boxing and cooking (though not all at once, that would be messy). I had an incredible Pad Thai for dinner round the corner and was thoroughly impressed.

The next day I wondered around the town looking at all of the beautiful temples, had another incredible lunch (mango sticky rice for dessert, yum) then went to the free cooking class and made, you guessed it, Pad Thai, before going for coconut ice cream with some of my hostel friends.

The next morning,  after a sleepless night thanks to a heavy snorer in my room, I took part in a Muay Thai boxing class. Naturally I was pretty rubbish, even worse due to lack of sleep, but an interesting experience and a quick way to make friends.

I was keen to visit "sticky falls" the next day, a waterfall about an hour away, but this required a bit of planning and to gather people who also wanted to go. This didn't work out, but instead I went up to some mountain temples on a tuktuk taxi- a van with an open back that could squeeze 10 people in. The temples were beautiful and elaborate as always, we had planned to walk between them, but the jungle was so overgrown we lasted about 5 minutes. Then it was back for a yoga class. Later on, I went for dinner at one of the night markets with some other travellers and had some dumplings followed by the greatest dessert ever- roti bread with banana, nutella and a drizzle of condensed milk. I also discovered that one of my fellow travellers went to school with my cousin Charlotte in Walthamstow. Small world!

The next day, I was meant to be travelling to a hippie village called Pai and staying overnight. But I'd sacked it off last minute as it sounded like a faff to get there and the type of place where you needed a few days. Instead I booked a day trip to Chaign Rai, a town a couple of hours away with some interesting temples. The day trip was ok, I saw a white temple (so bright I could barely open my eyes), a blue temple then a black temple/museum. I was glad I did it (I have a feeling if I didn't have it booked in, I would've wasted the day), but perhaps I should've just chilled instead.

That evening I had to move accommodation for one night, so I thought I'd treat myself to a hotel. Although it wasn't really a treat in the end and more like a downgrade and I was missing my nice clean hostel. Frustrating as it had good reviews.

For my last day in Chaign Mai, I had plans to chill, but accidentally became an organiser of a group trip to a nearby waterfall. Hostelworld, the app I book some of my Hostels through (the alternative is booking.com which is generally cheaper and more flexible) has a great chat function, meaning you can seamlessly message other travellers in your area. Which is how I met some other travellers to split the cost of this excursion. Sticky Falls is a waterfall you can climb due to the super grippy rock underneath it. There are ropes you can grab if you want something to hold onto, but even I, who has worse balance then most toddlers I know, could handle it. Though best not to look down when you're half way up... It was so much fun and I was so glad I did it. It was a bit slippery at the top, but we worked as a team to defeat it. Afterwards we went into the little shop to get an icecream and I managed to fall over a 2inch step in an incredibly dramatic fashion, sprain my ankle and cut my knee. Everybody was very concerned, but this does happen to me about once every couple of years. So aside from being embarrassed, I was fine hobbling back to the taxi. Serves me right for wearing silly, unsupportive sandles. Plus SE Asia is literally trip hazard city, so if anything, I did well to go 5 weeks before this happened.

When we got back, I RICED and grabbed (aka uber eats) a silly meal to eat not at a table (the hostel was more floor cusions and hammocks rather than any practical furniture). My ankle improved enough for me to hobble, so I arranged to meet one of my waterfall buddies at a night market as planned. I was starting to feel sick again, and the sight of some fried insects was a bit too much for me to handle. So back to the hostel for the next bout of food poisoning. On the plus side, I had a nice bonding experience with a nurse in my room who was also struck down by the same illness, so we sat outside and swapped travel stories and had a good laugh. 

The next morning, I was feeling somewhat better, which was jolly good as I had yet another flight down to Phuket.

Mango sticky rice with Coconut icecream

One of many beautiful temples

Hostel cooking class 

The result! I think I'll leave it to the chefs...

10/10 cool outfit points (it was washing day ok?! And I improvised with the legs cover up)

View of Chaign Mai

White Palace, Chaign Rai

Can you guess what this is called?

Sticky falls 

'Nam part 3b-The North- Ha Gian loop and Hanoi continued

Then it was off to the biggest adventure yet, the Ha Gian loop. The Ha Gian loop was a motorcycle tour that takes you through northern Vietnam and right up to the border with China. All the backpackers I met raved about it and everyone said it was a must do. But the only way to do it was on a motorbike. Although I had paid to have a driver, I was terrified and had read online it was dangerous. This wasn't helped by someone returning from the tour to Ha Gian, covered in blood due to an accident. But, I held on to the fact that a couple of friends had done it recently who said they felt completely safe and everyone had said how breathtakingly beautiful it was. Plus, the owner said that it was almost always the boys that were driving themselves that came off and usually on the third day as they became overly confident.

After a night's sleep at the tour company's accommodation (which was a room full of matresses, for about 40 of us) it was time for the briefing. I was more nervous now, what was I thinking? My friend Dale had said it would be an adventure. I didn't want adventure, I just wanted a cup of tea.

Anyway, there was about 70 of us organised into 6 groups, with most people opting to have a driver. I was paired up with a guy called Huy and in my group were 5 Dutch, an Aussie lass, a couple of Germans and another English gal. As soon as I got on the bike I felt at ease. Huy has been doing this job for a living for a few years so dodged every pothole and handled different terrain with ease.

 It's quite well organised too in that you travel in convoy with your group, with the most experienced driver leading and although all the groups are stopping at the same places, it's staggered so never felt too croweded. It also meant that it was easy to become friends with your group too. The views were AMAZING! I'm lucky to have travelled a lot, but this was the most beautiful landscape I've ever seen. It was pretty cold up there (though nothing a seasoned cyclist can't handle) and we were in the clouds at points, so bought a pair of plastic trousers and rain cover which did a good job of keeping the wind off, even if I looked a bit silly. I also realised why the only way to do it really was by motorbike. The area has only been opened to tourists in the last 10 years, and the roads aren't wide enough to handle two lanes of cars really. They are building the roads in parts at the moment, so in a couple of years time, it'll be flooded with tourists, but for now it's just a few hundred (generally young) back packers. Plus we encountered a couple of landslides that only a bike could get round. As well as incredible views, on our second day, they took us all the way up to the border with China which was cool. Apparently there never  used to be a fence, but you could see it now, weaving it's way through the mountains for thousands of miles. 

The homestays on the tour were mixed, the first night was luxury with only 7 of us per room. The second night was back to 20, was absolutely freezing as you were literally sleeping in a barn with the doors swinging open (luckily I nabbed a spare duvet) and a rat paying a visit in the night (some idiot had left food out). You could opt for a private room though. 

The food was great, lots of fresh air had given me my appetite back. They would also bring round "happy water" before our meal, some sort of rice wine/vodka and encouraged us to drink lots through complicated Viet drinking songs. I was able to restrain myself to a few as the thought of being hungover on a bike was too much. After dinner, they'd whip out the karaoke machines (I can't empathise how much they love Karaoke in Vietnam) and get the disco going.

All too soon, it was time to head back to Ha Gian. It was tempting to extend to do a forth day like the rest of my group was doing, but I wanted a recovery day in Hanoi. Plus, excitingly, I was having dinner in Ha Gian with my friend Tom from BBC. It was amazing and surreal to be hanging out with him in this random town in Northern Vietnam.

Back on the sleeper bus to Hanoi, I was actually starting to enjoy these lying down jouneys. We arrived at about 2am and after some mild harassment from taxi drivers, the backpackers on my bus formed a pack and moved away before ordering our Grabs (Asia's answer to Uber). Grab is great as a solo female traveller, as you are tracked your whole journey and there are heaps of safety features.

I'd booked myself a hotel room for my last few nights in Hanoi and it was so nice to sleep in a warm, dark, silent room. I visisted the Women's museum the next day which was cool.

Then the day after, I was booked onto a Ha Long bay cruise. Ha Long bay was ok. It was beautiful, but an absolute tourist trap like some sort of black mirror-esk nightmare (I had been warned about this). You couldn't move for tourists in a couple of places, but did see some cool caves, do some kayaking, swimming and climb up to a view point. It was an ok day out, but with a 3 hour journey each way, plus boat travel and bad time keeping, we were only really there for about 4 hours before it got dark.

My final day in Hanoi was pleasant one. I went to train street, a street where railway line passes through in close proximity (like 30cm) to shops and restaurants. I had been told that restaurant owners would wait for you by the barriers (you could only enter if you were going to one, to control numbers presumably). One guy offered to take me to his restaurant, then indicated to a tuktuk and asked for the equivalent of a tenner. Which is A LOT for Vietnam. I should've said no, but I was running out of time before next train and couldn't be bothered to argue. He cycled us in a big loop, but did take me to a restaurant to be fair. He didn't work for them though and owners saud he'd probably be arrested if caught. One of the benefits of a strict Vietnam is that they have lots of rules about how to treat tourists and conning them is a big no no. I'd missed the train, but suprisingly there was another in about 20mins (they are only a few times a day). Another tourist recommended that I sat upstairs so I would get an unobstructed view. Which was true, but then I could only see the roof. It was actually mad how close it was.

No time for round two, I went on a big old walk. The sites were ok, but not interesting enough to write about. I had wanted to go to the Ho Chi Minh museum, but it was shut, and I didn't fancy queuing to see his dead body at the nearby mausoleum.

That evening, I headed over to Dale's for an evening of Jackbox games with his mates. Jackbox is a computer game you all play through your phones that's projected onto the wall/tv and involves writing jokes or drawing and is a firm favourite with my mates in Bristol. It was so nice to do something normal.

Then on to Thailand!

Ha Gian Loop

Border with China on the right

Halong Bay

Train street

There it goes!

'Nam part 3a- The North. Tam Coc and Hanoi

After getting through the flight to Hanoi despite feeling rubbish, I got my first ever "VIP bus" to Tam Coc. This was quite interesting, the chairs all came with in built massagers. Tam Coc is known as the inland Halong Bay and it did not disappoint. It was much calmer than any of the cities and you woke up surrounded by these huge karst mountains. The homestay I was at had a swimming pool, was on the river's edge, quiet and a 5 min walk to the main street.

On my first day, I went on a boat ride from the town centre, powered by a woman using her feet to row the oars. It was pretty cool, with these mountains surrounding us and going through caves. The ticket place was absolutely chaotic, but I was told what to buy, and wasn't told there was a second part after the boat ride.

I'd signed up to do a tour the following day that took you to various temples and the Trang An national park. Turns out these places were all cycling distance away, so I needn't have bothered, but at least I didn't have to use my brain. 

Trang An was amazing! Another boat ride similar to the day before, but even more spectacular. It's also where they filmed the more recent King Kong films.

Finally, we were taken to a view point with 500 steps to the top. Which didn't sound like much, but was a lot in the heat. It was beautiful at the top but absolutely rammed as it was sunset. We (a couple of my day tour buddies and I) queued to climb up to the final apex, but after 10minutes and what looked to be incredibly sketchy footing, I gave up. 

The next day, I chilled by the pool and then went to do part 2 of my Tam Coc ticket which was a temple inside a mountain cave. Apparently there was a part 3 too, but that never materialised.

Next, back to Hanoi for the night, before heading to Ha Gian in the north. I hadn't quite realised you could go directly from Hanoi, but it gave me an extra day's recovery before a 7hour bus ride lying down. That evening I went to the Hanoi Water puppet show which was really interesting. Lots of funny sketches using puppets controlled with rods underwater and a suprising amount of indoor pyrotechnics. The hostel I was staying in was an odd one- triple bunk beds, a Japanese style toilet (with a heated seat and various sprays) but no doors to the rooms, so noisy.

Tam Coc

Trang An

500 steps. The valley is where I got the boat from Tam Coc

Water Puppet show, Hanoi